The Invisible Age
Ok, I’m going to be vulnerable here. You may think me to be a vain, whiney woman after reading this blog. But I’m writing this blog for other women of a “certain age”- to show them that they’re not alone.
I recently experienced a situation that made me feel invisible and less worthy as a woman. It was a blow to my ego, to be honest. I was out with my good friend the other night. She's over 10 years younger than me. After dancing most of the night on a packed dance floor, the band finished up and people wandered away, leaving me and my friend standing aside on the empty dance floor, where it was obvious we were together as friends. A man of about my age (mid 50s) came over and introduced himself to the two of us. After a few minutes of us chatting, he asked my younger friend for her phone number to add to a list of folks that meet up for coffee. He added my friend’s name and number to the long list that I could see on his phone. Then he turned to me, said “nice to meet you Julie” (wrong name), and walked away, not also adding me to his list in his phone. What am I, I thought? Chopped liver? I felt old and invisible and pissed off at the rudeness of this man for dismissing me so thoroughly. What does this even matter to me, I thought. I mean for God’s sake, I’m married. Why do I even care? But that loss of attention and respect, especially after most of my life being of a different story, was hard to accept. Hurtful even.
I know I’m not alone. I’ve many times heard other women my age complain about similar situations of being passed over and ignored.
According to a 2019 New York times article “Hollywood often works hard to convince us that older women aren't appealing, that they are boring, and worse, they don’t really exist, with considerably more opportunities afforded to their male counterparts.”
This is a sad comment on popular culture.
Yet…I also personally feel like my life gets better with each year that passes. I wouldn’t want to go back to my more stressful and uncertain years in my 30s. Today I have a thriving business that I’m passionate about that I didn’t even discover until my late 40s. I’m more content in my marriage as well, and in general feel wiser than I was 15-20 years ago.
My passion is to help women not feel so invisible by showing them their beauty and their very essence through my photography. By looking at their beautiful pictures, they can remember how they felt on the day of the photoshoot - confident, empowered and gorgeous. They remember who they really are, right now at their current age and at their best self.
This is me. I feel beautiful and vibrant in these fabulous pictures (thanks to stellar photographer, Shannon Beauclair). I am no shrinking violet in these photos. I am visible and now I exist in printed out pictures, for my children, their children, and most of all, for myself.
I encourage you, Ladies, to exist in photos. Show yourself, your family, and even your potential clients that you are HERE and proud of who you are. Even if you have reservations about getting your pictures taken, due to age, weight issues or clothing questions, please trust the process and know the significance that these portraits will hold for you and your family.
I provide a safe space for you to shine as your best self in our one on one, fun photoshoots where we get to hang out and play. You’ll be fully guided by me,. You’ll feel pampered by professional hair and makeup , which is offered at my studio. The day is a comfortable, fun time where you’ll leave feeling light and confident and excited to see your beautiful finished images. I would love to photograph you. You are worthy of this experience. You are perfect as you are RIGHT NOW. I truly believe this and want you to believe it too.